This above all: to thine own self be true, And it must follow, as the night the day, Thou canst not then be false to any man.
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William Shakespeare
I love you like a fat kid loves cake!
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Scott Adams
One cannot think well, love well, sleep well, if one has not dined well.
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Virginia Woolf
There is no love sincerer than the love of food.
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George Bernard Shaw
It seems to me that our three basic needs, for food and security and love, are so mixed and mingled and entwined that we cannot straightly think of one without the others. So it happens that when I write of hunger, I am really writing...
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M.F.K. Fisher
More Quotes By Jim Gaffigan
We are all a little weird. And we like to think that there is always someone weirder. I mean, I am sure some of you are looking at me and thinking, “Well, at least I am not as weird as you, ” and I am...
The only thing weaker than a toddler's handshake is their immune system.
Occasionally, a dog will be presented as some training method for having a baby. "My girlfriend and I got a dog. We are going to see if we can handle that before we have kids." This is a little like testing the waters of being...
TV news is like kryptonite to children. The two major shifts in taste for children to adulthood are news and mustard. Kids hate news and mustard. Well, mustard even has the word 'turd' in it. Maybe I should threaten my kids that if they don't...
When your mom was not in labor yelling at me, she made me laugh so hard.
